Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #42

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with thoughts concerning befores and afters. Many who know me will appreciate my saying that I am almost addicted to projects where there is a miraculous change.  I am mesmerized by photos featuring something or someone badly in need of renovation. The transformation possibilities pique my imagination and I can hardly wait to see the finished project. Having confessed my addition, I will readily admit that if I were forced to choose only one TV channel, I would, without hesitation, opt to live the rest of my life with HGTV.  One of my ideas of heaven would be continuous before and after decorating programs. The irony here is that I do even have cable at my home, so there is no way that dream could ever come true. I would have to depend on the kindness of others to share their cable with me!

Having made that confession, I would like to tie my addiction to the excitement I feel when someone we love chooses to change his before life into an after that is already bringing him great peace. Today Robert was baptized and we couldn’t be happier. When we first met him, Robert was pretty much a wild child. He was living with his brother and sister-in-law and they felt that his sole aim in life was to create havoc in their home. He was thoughtless and selfish. He contributed noting to the household save constant frustration and annoyance. It was not a happy before picture and there did not seem to be any hope for a remodel.

In truth, Robert is not a child. He is a young adult in his twenties who has lived the majority of his life without much direction.  When asked by the family to please turn down his head-banging music, he would laugh and turn it up. When the request was to find songs that had less vile lyrics so that the children didn’t have to listen, he looked for music that contained even more offensive language. He spent over 40.00 a week on cigarettes but when asked to contribute to the family income, he scoffed at such an idea, saying that he could not afford it. Robert is the father of a two-year-old born of a short-lived relationship and he has grown used to not being a part of that child’s life. When we first met him, he was rude to us and dismissive. If he knew that we were coming to visit, he would absent himself and if we happened to drop by unannounced, he would leave as quickly as he could. There was a darkness about him that seemed fed by his unhappiness and his lack of direction.

One day, after several months of avoidance, Robert approached us and simply asked when we were going to teach him. We were stunned, but recovered quickly enough to make an appointment for the next day.  Over the last few months, we have learned that one of the reasons Robert asked to speak with us is that he noticed that his brother, who had grown up in the same home had made changes to his life that had brought him peace. Even through the loud music and the questionable lyrics and the rudeness, Robert was able to notice that his brother and sister-in-law were doing things in a way that looked like a cohesive family. He was impressed that the children were well-behaved and treated with love and patience. He watched as the two little boys asked to say their prayers and volunteered to say a blessing on their meals. He watched as his brother’s little family played and worshiped together and one day, Robert realized that he had been wrong in maligning them. He actually wanted to know what they knew and he wanted to learn how he could have the same peace in his life.

So, Robert has become an “After”.  He no longer resembles the before that he once was. His change of heart has brought him peace and a new direction. He is happy and settled and almost the exact opposite of the person he used to be. We are not the only ones who have seen the change. Today at his baptism someone mentioned that his darkness has now been replaced by light. Robert having saved over 40.00 a week by not purchasing cigarettes, spent some of those savings on a new sound system for his sister-in-law, so that she could enjoy the music that she preferred. He is doing dishes and helping to watch over his two young nephews. He has said that he never knew that a person could feel this good.

Today at his baptism, Robert was warned that the water was pretty chilly. In speaking of it afterwards, he simply said that someone had said that the water was cold, but that he was totally unaware of its temperature. He said that all he felt was warmth.

As always we are happy and trying to work hard. Although Ward sometimes rolls his eyes when I mention how much I love renovations, he will admit to being pretty pleased about those renovated lives that we have been privileged to witness here in New Zealand. We appreciate the examples these “Afters” have been to us in our lives. We also appreciate the truly amazing examples you have been in our lives as well. We wish you all the peace that Robert is feeling at this moment.

Love, Ward and Susan    Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

Robert was baptized this morning by his brother Jason. The "Before" Robert would never have been smiling so braodly. 

Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #41

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on the problems we face when we choose not to set things right. Last week, you may recall that I spoke about the young woman who chose as a guest in our home, to take some items that did not belong to her. I shared my feelings concerning the range of emotions that I encountered upon discovery of the loss, and the difficulty I had experienced in dealing the resulting anger.

Two weeks have passed and so has the anger. I can honestly say that there is no more angst, but as our next cottage meeting approached, I found myself feeling very curious as to what our young friend might or might not do. In anticipation of our next get together, I will admit to being proactive in regards to anyone having private access to some of our rooms. I also put some items away for safe keeping. The real truth here if I am to be honest, is that I hid some personal belongings that I would not be able to replace. Past that, I had decided to counteract any ill will on my part by replacing it with a healthy dose of curiosity.

Last evening we held another cottage meeting and I found myself watching in anticipation as each car pulled into the drive. As the doors opened, one after another, to reveal the occupants, it soon became clear that our young friend was not going to be in attendance. To be perfectly honest, I was slightly disappointed to see that she was not going to join us. I would not have the opportunity to observe her behavior and inwardly I had hoped that perhaps, just perhaps, she would do the right thing and return however surreptitiously, the purloined items. It was not to be.

Her gracious grandfather apologized for her absence and simply stated that she “had not felt like coming”. He also confided that he thought that she was being lazy, but of course he did not know what I knew and I replied that we would miss her and let it go at that. The evening was a lot of fun and the company was enjoyable. There were tender moments and a lot of laughter. The kai (meal) that the participants provided was delicious and my chocolate brownies were a hit. It was a lovely evening and I am sorry that she missed it.

Later last evening, in the quiet that falls just at bedtime, I pondered all that this young woman had missed. By not admitting her mistake and trying to repair the damage she had done, a pattern of behavior was being set in motion. She will no longer, I assume, feel comfortable in our home and she will miss enjoyable interactions. She will have to fashion some excuse every other Friday to avoid attending our evenings, which means that she may have to be less than honest with her grandparents. She may be concerned that she may meet us in some other venue, and that may cause additional nervousness. In fact, we have a culture night that we are attending this evening, and we expect that she will be there. She will not possibly know where and when we might find ourselves in the same room and I can’t imagine how unsettling that could be for her. She will most likely spend what could be an enjoyable evening, trying avoiding us.

I wouldn’t wish that discomfort on anyone, yet there are those of us, who at one time or another may have experienced similar feelings. In contrast to our young visitor, we may have learned that admitting and owning up to our mistakes is freeing. We rid ourselves of the burden of not dealing and the onus that it becomes in our lives. We have learned that the only way out is through. We have learned that life does go on and it goes on much more peacefully. Owning up to our mistakes is the first step in not making them again. It truly is the cure for what ails us. It is always a step in the right direction.

So, I hope that at some point this young woman will become uncomfortable enough in her own skin to learn a very valuable lesson. If not with me, then I hope that she will learn it while dealing with someone else. I would welcome her confession with a hug and a smile and be grateful that she had chosen to travel in a different direction. I would be happy that hopefully, she had learned what a relief it was to fix what she what she had broken.

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard. We are grateful for parents who taught us how to own up to our mistakes. We have learned from you how to behave graciously in less than ideal circumstances. We are reminded that we are expected to forgive and I personally pray for a short memory o many occasions. In this particular situation, I find that being grateful for what was not lost is the cure for being frustrated over what was.  It’s all relative after all. Ward’s daughter, Teresa (my bonus daughter) always chooses to be positive and I have decided to be just like her when I grow up!

Love, Ward and Susan     Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #40

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on the lessons that I have relearned in the last two weeks. I had fully intended to share my new enlightenment with you in last week’s blog, but as I tried several times to compose my weekly missive, it became glaringly clear to me that I had not fully embraced the idea of letting go. Like most of us, I am a work in progress, and my progress was hampered by lingering feelings that needed to be faced before they could be banished.

If all of that sounds a tad bit cryptic, perhaps the shortest possible explanation of the events of the last two weeks will be helpful. Ward and I have had the usually enjoyable opportunity of hosting bi-monthly cottage meetings in our home. A cottage meeting is a gathering of people, some members of our church; some not, who come together to enjoy some sort of fun activity, a meal and a short spiritually oriented lesson. We typically entertain about twenty people at any one of these meetings and we have always looked forward to having the opportunity to share our home with others.

Sadly, that enjoyment for me was marred by the actions of one young woman who, accompanied by her grandparents, regularly attends our little gathering. We love the grandparents and have always looked forward to seeing the three of them at our door. Two weeks ago, I noticed that this young woman left the meeting to “use” the bathroom several times. I remember thinking to myself that it was very unusual for her to leave the living room so often and for such long intervals. I wondered if she wasn’t feeling well and upon her second return, asked if she was feeling under the weather. She smiled, said she was fine and then about half an hour later, returned to the bathroom for the third time. I should mention, here that the bathroom is separated from our meeting area by a door and a long hallway. This hall opens into all four of our bedrooms.

The next morning, as we were preparing to leave for the day, I noticed that something that I needed was not in its usual location. Thinking that I had mislaid it, I went searching in earnest. I retraced my steps of the previous day and even recalled Big Bird’s admonition to walk backwards in my mind. All of this was to no avail. So, assuming as I usually do, that missing items turn up eventually, I continued to prepare for the day. Eventually, I noticed that another item was missing  as well and at that moment, my brain switched from confusion to conviction. It became obvious that someone we trusted and had welcomed into our home had chosen to repay that welcome by stealing from us. I have always believed that although we may not be able to control our initial reaction to a situation, we have the choice of how to feel about it past that first impulse. My first reaction was to feel very angry. However, that anger colored my thoughts for much longer than it should have and I am sorry to say that it has taken me the better part of two weeks to come to terms with it. But come to terms with it I have, and I wanted to share a little of what I have just relearned.

I have relearned that anger is counterproductive and destructive. I have relearned that the person feeling the anger is the one who suffers most, certainly not the object of that anger.  I have been reminded that anger is a waste of time and energy and does not promote peace. I should have remembered that being angry colors every thought and action and often distances us from others. I have once again come to the realization that being angry, especially for a prolonged period of time, is not something that I want to spend my life experiencing.

Bad things happen to all of us. It’s just what happens as we live our lives. We learn to accept what we cannot change and move on. We learn to fill in the dents that have been caused by the careless and sometimes thoughtless actions of others. We learn to cope and we learn that we will survive. When one son or the other would return from school to report that his car had been broken into, part of my job, I believed, was to help them dispel that initial anger that they were experiencing. One day, the perfect thought came to me and it has been our family mantra ever since. I simply said that in the grand scheme of things, I would much rather have bad things happen to my sons than think that they were the cause of bad things happening to someone else. I take great comfort in knowing that my sons have not been the perpetrators of someone else’s misfortune.

So, as I worked all of this through in my heart and mind this last while, I have decided not to be angry at this young woman. In truth, I did entertain the fantasy of confronting her in some sort of way that let her know that I knew what she had done without actually accusing her. But in the end, I realized that scheming like that was a waste of my time and energy. I am sad for her for the decision she made and I also know that I will not approach her grandparents, as I do not fully understand their relationship and I do not wish to destroy the opportunity to have them in our home.

Having said that, there will be another cottage meeting here next week, and Ward and I have talked about the ways that we could protect our interests by being a little more proactive. If our young friend does choose to visit us again, we feel perfectly justified in preventing a second bout of sticky fingers. The anger has dissipated, but it shouldn’t have taken as long as it did. That was my fault and I am working on it. I gratefully remind myself that hopefully I have not, nor have those in my family, been the cause of something unfortunate happening to someone else.

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard. I am grateful for the lessons that have been the focus of the last two weeks and I am thankful for all of you who are welcome guests in our lives. We acknowledge that instead of taking anything from us, you have all been instrumental in giving us fond memories. You have gifted us with the peace that comes through associating with people whom you love and trust. Thank you all for that. I have learned that peace is highly underrated and I am so grateful to be able to feel that peace one again.

Love, Ward and Susan      Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #39

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on appreciating change that new surroundings can offer. I will readily admit to being a city girl. My experience with farm life is very limited. My experience with horses, for example, consists of delightful merry-go-round adventures and a handful of rental opportunities. I appreciate the beauty of those animals, but know next to nothing about their care and feeding. The same can be said for cows, sheep, goats and pigs. These creatures have always been out of my realm of experience and to be honest, I never really gave them a thought one way or the other. Suddenly, we are living a life surrounded by farm animals, not to mention ducks, rabbits and wild turkeys, and when you become more aware of your surroundings, you have the opportunity to enjoy the peacefulness of the life that has been gifted you. Every day, there are opportunities to learn and to laugh. Finding humor in everyday events is truly something that we have come to appreciate while living a countrified life. 

So this week, instead of presenting our adventures in a written format, I thought that you might enjoy a pictorial depiction of life in the country with Elder and Sister Belliston. We have learned to love our new home and its green paddocks. I know what it sounds like when a sheep has a cold and just how hard it is to convince a cow to move out of the road because you are late to a meeting. We are experiencing a country-style adventure and we are loving it!

Our friend, Tom invited us for a ride in the country. It was a hair-raising four-wheel drive to the top of the mountain. I could have missed the ride but would not have wanted to  miss this view!

Country roads are always so crowded!

New Zealand countryside perfected.

I have often heard the phrase,"wait until the cows come home". These cows are coming home and in single-file!

When we go visiting in the country, we visit friends of all types. This is Ross and his horse, Major.

Only in the country would you find your namesake living in a barnyard. Please say hello to Sister Belliston the pig. Sister Belliston met with an untimely demise, but I won't go into details.

Ward learned how to suck the sweet nectar out of a flower. When the stem is empty, you can turn it into a whistle!

Only in the country will you find such cute railroad crossing signs.

 Only in the country is it possible to have a cow pass your car as he is going faster than you are.

This is the country version of a family home evening dinner. Ward purchased welding rods to act as hot dog holders. This is our backyard!!

 

These country creatures surprised us as we came around a bend in the road. It was dark and they were totally unexpected.
 



Only in the country can you find this view out of your bedroom window.

 Sister Caldwell is teaching Ward a country craft. She is a master spinner and weaver.

 I was thrilled today as Sister Caldwell presented me with this beautiful wrap. This is Merino wool that came from local sheep. She carded, spun and knitted my new favorite thing. This photo does not do the color justice, but I am beyond thrilled!

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard. We appreciate the opportunity to experience life in the “Land of the Long White Cloud” and to live amongst people who are grateful for the bounties of their land where no one need go hungry. We have found ourselves wishing many times that more of you could experience the wonders of this country, so we hope that your vicarious visit to our island will suffice. If you enjoy what you see today, please be assured that we will bring hundreds more photos home with us should you choose to become more thoroughly acquainted with our adopted island.

Love Ward and Susan   Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

In addition to this week's blog, we would like to acknowledge the kind words that so many of you sent in regards to my love letter to Bob, which was the subject of an earlier posting. Sadly, Bob Beall passed away a little over a week ago. We will miss him, but take solace in knowing that we will see him again one day. Our love goes out to his family. xoxoxoxo 

Adventures in Paradise volume 2 #38

Kia ora!  Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on vocabulary and how the words we use define our culture. I have found it fascinating to learn how some cultures lack words to describe certain experiences with which most of us are familiar. Many cultures, I am finding, also have words that have no equivalent in English. I have found it touching that some of these words and expressions are descriptive of familial relationships.

When we first arrived in the Cook Islands, five years ago, we were faced with strange and confusing terminology. Although our new friends were speaking in English, many of the terms they were using were unfamiliar and confusing to us. They were using words that we easily recognized but their context was unrecognizable. When we first encountered the term “Feeding Mother”, we had no idea what that meant. We started asking questions and soon found that in a country where there are no visible homeless, the terms, “Feeding Mother and “Feeding Father” were descriptive of those who took in children without legally adopting them. These men and women would feed, clothe and shelter young people, often until they reached adulthood. There was never a formal agreement or any compensation; it was just the way it was. In the Polynesian culture, there is always room for one (or several) more. No one needs to be without a home. In the Maori language, there is no word for legal adoption.  

When we arrived in New Zealand, we were struck that many Maori words were used in conjunction with English. We find it a charming mix of two cultures that have learned to live together on two little islands. Even the Chamber of Commerce booklet we were given explaining government services had Maori words intermingled with English and we again found that we needed an interpreter to ascertain proper meanings. This publication, entitled, “Living in Gisborne City”, introduces the reader to Justin and Aroha Gizzy and their Whanau. Having recently learned that Wh has an “F” sound, we realized that the word whanau, was pronounced  “fahnu.” And by reading the booklet, or at least those parts that we understood, we eventually realized that whanau is the Maori word for family. It has been interesting to us that many Maori words are used by Kiwis, even when they have no Maori family ties.

As we became more acquainted with our new friends we began hearing another term which left us questioning its meaning. Having now learned the meaning of the word whanau, we were able to make an educated guess as to the word “Whangai”. We have often heard friends refer to a particular family relationship by saying, “He was whangaied into the family. As was the case in the Cooks, this phrase referred to the non-binding action of a child being brought in under the protection and tutelage of people not members of the child’s immediate family. This practice makes for confusing family trees to be sure, but it also speaks to the heart of people who value familial relationships and don’t care to think of people being on the outside looking in. Again, this Maori word does not mean adoption in the legal sense and most people that we spoke with about this could not imagine the need for anything to be formalized. The need was there and the child was whangaied. It is an open-arms, open home sensitivity where everyone is loved. It is as simple as that.

So, we have learned more touching lessons about relationships as defined by the words our friends use to describe them. We have again taken note that in Maori there is no word for a formalized, legal adoption. In the Maori culture, there is no need for such a word and to be honest, they cannot imagine why my culture has need for a word like that either!

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard.  We have almost fully recovered and have truly felt that while we were ill, we were whangaied into more than one thoughtful family as people have been concerned for our health. For that, we are deeply grateful. We are also grateful for all of you who have whangaied us into your families at home. It is truly a gift to feel at home when we spend time with you. Time is passing too quickly and should any of you still be thinking of paying us a visit, please korerorero mai. We hope that you will come and talk to us!!

Love, Ward and Susan    Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

This is the cover of the guide to living in Gisborne. Meet Justin and Aroha Gizzy and their whanau.

Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #37

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on creature comforts and what we miss most when we are unwell. It is winter here in New Zealand and despite preemptive flu shots and in my case, a booster shot of the pneumovax, we have been ill. While it’s true that we have not suffered any more than most of our dear friends here in Gisborne, it is also true that we have had a slightly different perspective on that discomfort and some of the reasons for it. That perspective has, while we have been ailing, engendered an attitude of wistfulness. We find ourselves wishing to be in other circumstances. We are missing home, our own beds, and snuggling under our own blankets. Isn’t that the way it is when we don’t feel well?

Early in our residency in Gisborne, we began to notice something interesting. There were trailers full of firewood stacked to their brims parked along almost every roadway. These trailers advertized a phone number and promised delivery within twenty-four hours. Often, one could see two or three of these trailers parked in tandem, each with their specific contact information as well as the price and an assurance that the wood was two-years dry. My personal experience with fireplaces relegated them to a “mood enhancer” classification and I did not at first grasp the concept that people here, would be buying wagon loads of wood to feed into their fireplaces as a primary means of keeping warm during the coming winter. I did not fully appreciate that entire families would spent the long winter months, “rugged up” sequestered in one room huddled around a firebox. But I do now.

For some reason, most homes in New Zealand do not have central heating. It is their way here and people seem genuinely puzzled when I mention that all we have to do to stay warm is to flip a switch or press one button and the whole house heats itself. Most have no concept that my home is not equipped with a series of portable oil burner-type heaters or fans and that we do not have to move these devices from one room to another, as needed. It is entirely normal to them to live with a labyrinth of electrical cords running through their homes as these heaters are constantly being rearranged, often requiring the use of extension cords. Power is very expensive here, so many of our friends cannot afford to operate these heaters, hence the need for the constant supply of firewood during the winter months. I did not appreciate how difficult it would be for our friends to stay warm during the long winter months, but I do now.

As first, I was entertained by the endless ads hawking portable heaters and the adult-sized onesies, complete with hoods, which were displayed in a vast variety of animal prints. Advertisements featuring insulation and new windows were seen everywhere. I laughed out loud the first time that I discovered a display of hot water bottles in a local store. These “hotties” as they are known here, are best utilized by encasing them in a designer cover before filling them with hot water. I was mesmerized by the array of cover choices but again did not appreciate how crucial they were in helping residents to keep warm. I did not appreciate that the hoods on those onesies were crucial in keeping heads covered and toasty while sleeping. But I do now.

As I have spent this last week trying to stay warm in someone else’s home and bed, I have become more acutely aware of what I have taken for granted. Never again, will I adjust the thermostat in my Salt Lake City home without appreciating the simplicity of that action. The next time that I build (ok Ward builds) a fire in my fireplace, I will be reminded that the cozy atmosphere created by that fire would not be the fundamental reason for building it in the homes of our Kiwi friends. Although, I consider myself to be financially conservative, I do not spend a great deal of time in worry over whether or not I can afford to pay my utility bill. No part of my home goes unused in the winter because I cannot afford to keep it heated. I will spend my next winter in Utah reminding myself to be grateful.

The truth is that New Zealand is wet and cold in the winter. Kiwis have a struggle to stay warm and dry and it is simply expected that June, July and August will be difficult months. Everyone has their own home remedy for the aches, pains and coughs that accompany the change in the weather. There is very little complaining; rather we have noticed a “let’s just get on with it” attitude and the residents have learned to “rug up”. We have refrained from any sort of sentence that might start with the words, “In our country”, as we would appear to be ungrateful guests and we are not ungrateful. Our friends cope as they look after each other. Last Monday, a sweet family left a pot of soup a loaf of bread and some breakfast scones on our doorstep and we appreciated their thoughtfulness. Another friend mixed up a batch of hot lemon tea for me with lemons from our own tree! The attitude here is more of a “We’re in this together, so let’s get though it together” and we have learned a lot by observation.

The lovely news here is that because there is so much winter rain, everything is turning green and lush. Daffodils are springing up in clumps near the paddock and there are buds on the Hydrangea bushes. We know that spring is coming and soon we will all emerge from our collective hibernation. Soon the woes of winter will be forgotten as we begin to enjoy the sunshine and the beaches. It’s the cycle of life here and we have become caught up in it at well.

So, while this last week or so has left me lusting after my duvet and push button heating, I will also willingly admit that I would not have missed this adventure for the world. I am grateful for all of the lessons that I have learned this winter and will always be beholden to the people who have taught them. There will never be another winter in my life, no matter where I might happen to be, where I won’t be thinking of those here who have to work a little harder to experience the warmth that I have always accepted without much thought.

As always we are happy and trying to work hard. We are eternally grateful for the warmth of the friendships we enjoy with you. We cherish your thoughtfulness over the years and that is one of the reasons that we miss home so much when we are not feeling well. It is where we have always felt most nurtured. We now happily add other names and faces to that list of people who we look to for comfort. We are grateful.

Love, Ward and Susan    Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

This wagon load of wood is selling for about 250.00, but would not last the whole winter.

Notice that for 145.00, you are not buying a full trailer, rather it's only the wood inside the box.

This is our oil burner in the bedroom. We remind each other not to touch it when the red light is on.

Andrea came to our home for dinner all rugged up. He looks pretty cute in his hoodie robe. We could not coax any adult into modeling their onesies!

We have been encouraged to take a "hottie" to bed!

Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #36

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on predators and a mother’s protective instinct. It is lambing season here and everywhere we look, we are enchanted by the spectacle playing out around us. Each day, as we notice countless wobbly little bundles of wool perched precariously upon spindly matchstick legs, we marvel at the miracle of birth and we are touched by the tender care that these new mothers exhibit towards their babies.  It is a magical time here in New Zealand and we are grateful to participate, if only as spectators.

Watching the lambs instinctively tending to their offspring, it occurred to me that these particular sheep do not know just how fortunate they are. There are no natural predators in New Zealand. These new mothers have the luxury of watching their children cavort happily in the paddocks without the concern of being too anxious over their safety. In truth the most pressing concern one new mother experienced was the presence of two camera-wielding Americans who were clicking away on the other side of a fence. It was clear that we were making her uncomfortable, so we drove away, leaving her to focus on her twins in private. These new mothers don’t have much to worry about, and I wish that I could say the same for human parents.

What would it be like if we humans did not have to worry about predators where our own children are concerned? What if the world were a safer place? What if we weren’t constantly concerned about the physical safety of our kids? What if we didn’t fret over broken bones and broken hearts? What if we could just sit back and watch?

There have been times in the growing up years of my sons, when I found myself wishing that I did not have to worry so much, but that is what human mothers do best, isn’t it? I remember looking into the bassinette, where my week-old son, Jared was swaddled, sleeping peacefully, and thinking naively that I would never worry more about him than I did at that moment. Thankfully, I could not see far enough into the future to know what it would be like to experience being awakened at 2:00 in the morning nineteen years later by a voice in the dark saying simply “ Mom and Dad, I think you had better wake up”. In those few seconds before turning on the light, fear and dread washed through my brain. What had happened? There was no mistaking that something was wrong! Then, a calmness settled as I struggled to wake fully. My mind was sleepily processing the situation and I reminded myself that whatever had happened, my son was home. He was home and because I knew where he was and that he was talking, I would be able to cope with whatever had taken place. It was the single most reassuring thought that I have ever experienced as a mother. My son was home and at that moment, nothing else mattered.

To make a long story a little shorter, earlier that evening Jared had been in a serious automobile accident. He had lost control of his vehicle on a dark, snow covered mountain road in Park City and he and his little white car had ended up in a river. Fortunately members of his band had been following him and were quick to the rescue. The car did not survive, but my son did and for that I will be forever grateful. I am so thankful for the calm reassuring feeling that settled over me that morning in the dark, as I realized that my son was home. That feeling epitomizes my experience with motherhood.

I should make it perfectly clear here, that my sons have given my very little to worry about, but I have worried just the same. It’s one of the things that I do best. I have not stopped being concerned for them, even though they are grown men. I want them to always be healthy and happy and if I had my choice (and I don’t!) they would still be coming down the stairs for breakfast and sharing with me their plans for the day. I miss the everydayness of our earlier lives together, but they chose to grow up instead of staying little boys and I miss them.

So, as I watch those new mothers being so relaxed around their little lambs, I envy them in a way for their lack of angst. They will never have to worry about so many unsavory elements of today’s society. They will not spend one moment concerned over hurt feelings or broken hearts. They will not lose sleep when their lambs come home later than they should. They will not worry that they are lost. But I do not envy the fact that their babies will grow up so quickly and sooner than later, they will all forget that they are related. I am grateful that I have loved my children enough to be constantly worried about them. I am glad, that for a season, I was their protector.

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard. Once a mother, always a mother and I suppose I will always be looking for another little lamb to watch over. One of our little lambs here, is young mother Rana, who will be baptized next Saturday and we are so happy for the peace that has come into her life as she has made decisions that will help her to provide a better life for herself as well as for that of her young daughter. We are going to enjoy watching her learn to walk on her new wobbly spiritual legs as she makes her way in her new life. We will be there to help her up if she falls, and soon enough, she will find that she won’t need us quite as much as she did. That’s just what parenting is all about, isn’t it?

Love, Ward and Susan     Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand

These babies are less than ten minutes old. The lamb in the foreground has not yet tried to stand. That is his hind leg stretching out behind him.

Newly-born lambs stay very close to their mothers.

 Twins!

These babies instinctively know where to look for their first meal. Mom is licking them clean.  

The twins are bathed and ready to face the world

This whole paddock was full of mothers and their children

Kindergarten is open!

Rana will be baptized on Saturday and her baby girl will be blessed next month!