Adventures in Paradise 37
Kia Orana, everyone! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts concerning time. We are finally learning to accept and to some extent, understand the island way of reckoning time. We are learning not to worry so much about what the clock says. We are learning to “go with the flow” and we have become more relaxed in the process.
Relating the events of our week here may help you to see through our eyes, the challenges and humor associated with adapting to island time. We were invited to a wedding with my cake as the guest of honor. The marriage was scheduled for four in the afternoon on a hot and slightly humid (understatement here) Thursday. We trooped up a narrow path to the house, balancing our precious cargo as we went and arrived at five minutes to four. Having deposited the cake on the table provided, we noticed that we were the first guests! Did we have the time wrong? Was this the correct day? Where was everyone? To make our long story short, the marriage did not actually begin until well after five. As I was waiting in the heat, I watched in dismay as my cake started reacting to the heat and the humidity. It was going south! I finally asked a passing relative of the bride to please refrigerate the cake until the wedding “actually” was about to begin. When the cake returned, it was frozen!
Thinking that the wedding might actually begin at its appointed hour, and factoring in the feast to follow, with the accompanying speeches, we had assumed that it would be safe to schedule another appointment for eight o’clock that evening. As the kai kai and toasts went on and on, it became increasing apparent that we would need to leave early to keep to our schedule. When there was a momentary lull in the speakers, I stood up and gave a toast of my own. In it, I congratulated the bride and groom and wished them a wonderful life. I then explained the reason we needed to be going and apologized for our early departure. Running down the muddy hill in the dark, with my sandals slipping all the way, I kept my fingers crossed that we were not going to be late for our next appointment.
While I relate that I was trying to remain calm throughout this evening, I will admit to feeling a certain amount of pressure to be on time. Rarotongans have no sense of this kind of frustration! We arrived at home at one minute to eight. Whew! We made it. All is well. You may not be surprised to hear that we began yet another vigil. Finally, after waiting for over thirty minutes, I texted (yes, I have learned this art) Chad, our missing person, only to be told that he could not make it and could he reschedule for the next day at seven? Had I been in America , I might have suggested that we would have appreciated a call so as not to leave us wondering, but that is not the way it works here. Oh well………….
On Friday, we began watching for our visitors at the appointed time. Seven o’clock came and went and we began what Ward and I have come to call our “Island Countdown”. Starting with the actual scheduled time of arrival we now assume that in the first half hour, the person is probably just late. So from seven to seven-thirty, we presumed that Chad would be coming any minute. From seven-thirty to eight o’clock, we had to consider the possibility that Chad might be late or not coming at all. From eight to eight thirty, it seemed likely that Chad would not be coming and by nine o’clock, we felt safe in thinking that we could turn down the lights and consider looking for our fuzzy slippers. Chad and his family arrived with no explanation or apology at nine-thirty. We smiled, welcomed them in and pushed the slippers under the nearest chair.
I could encapsulate the rest of the week by simply stating that not one of our appointments took place at the expected time. We have mentioned before that we have learned to expect and accept the unexpected. If we were not learning to adapt, we could be real danger of losing our grip on reality, but again that is just the way it is.
I have learned valuable lessons over the years from those who are far wiser than I. I have learned to slow down and appreciate that events happen in their own due course. Several years ago, I found an article on Timing written by Elder Dallin Oaks that literally saved my life. For a period of time copies of that article were posted in every room in my home. I looked to that article as a constant source of direction. I did not learn to be more passive while waiting for something to “happen” to me. Rather, I learned to appreciate a timetable that might not be my own. I have become more peaceful, which is not to be confused with complacency. I have learned to slow down and trust. By doing this, I have had remarkable experiences in being in just the right place at just the right time. One could regard these experiences as mere coincidences, but for me, I recognize them as evidence of things that occur due to proper timing.
Earlier this week, I had a sudden urge to visit the Cook Island library. I had never been there before, but I was certain that I “needed” to go there that day. We had a young mother with us who was without transport and we were helping her run some errands. This woman, the mother of three young children, was struggling to find employment to help support her family, but did not want a full-time job or one that would leave her baby in the care of someone else. What she needed was a job scheduled for times when her husband could be home. Jobs like that are almost impossible to find. While we were driving, we brainstormed ideas of where she might look. While we were discussing employment ideas, I asked if it were open, would she would mind my stopping at the library. She accompanied me into a very small building. While I wandered somewhat aimlessly though stacks of musty books, I was vaguely aware that LeAnn was speaking with someone. After I left a donation in the form of a library card application, we returned to the van. As we walked into the sunlight from the dimly-lit library, I noticed that LeAnn had tears in her eyes and was smiling. The assistant librarian, upon recognizing LeAnn, had offered her a job managing a shop at Saturday market! What timing! Oh, yes, I should say, that yesterday I returned to the library to donate some books that friends have brought to me. It was the same time of the day as our earlier visit, but the library was closed.
So, as usual, we are happy and trying to work hard. We love our island, our new friends and their ways. People here suggest that you should all slow down and stop the all your worry about time. It is all relative, after all. Enjoy life and those around you. I doubt that I will ever fully adapt to the island timetable, but I am learning to appreciate the way it is here. I can honestly say that each of you has come into our lives at exactly the right time and we are grateful for that. Each of your e-mails arrives at the exact right moment and while you may recall our blog about the worn out shoes, you might also remember that the same day that blog was sent; I received a package from my friend Ida. That package contained two new pairs of sandals! The person who said, “It’s’ all in the timing”, was correct in my opinion. So until next time, Ka kite.
Love, Ward and Susan Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in the Cooks
We bought this clock at Saturday market. It says it all, don't you think?
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