Adventures in Paradise Volume 2 #46

Kia ora! Our excellent adventure continues with some thoughts on traditions. Lately, we have been trying to explain with some clarity, the reason for and the traditions associated with Thanksgiving. We are receiving a lot of blank stares as we attempt to describe a typical Thanksgiving Day and the menu that goes along with it. On a humorous note, I find it slightly ironic that in a country that describes most of its meals as a “feed” the locals do not seem to understand our description of overindulgence on the particular day! What our friends here do understand however, is the focus on spending time with friends and family. They gravitate to that particular concept because so many of their traditions are intrinsically tied to connecting with others.

Such is the sweet and very ancient practice of the Hongi. If you have ever witnessed two persons touching noses and foreheads in greeting, you may have wondered at the meaning of that particular gesture. It is a welcome deeply spiritual in nature and usually done between people who feel safe and familiar with each other. It may also be used as a welcome for visiting dignitaries, but traditionally this form of hello is saved for close acquaintances who revere and honor each other. When the Hongi is used to greet a visitor, this “ sharing of breath”, transports that guest from the status of a newcomer to that of a person belonging to the land.

Tradition tells us that the Hongi recalls the Maori legend of the creation of the first earthly woman, Hineahuone. She was formed from clay by the creator god, Tane, who then breathed life into her nostrils. In more modern times, the Hongi has become a traditional Maori greeting where people press their noses together, thus symbolizing the sharing of breath. What can be more touching between friends that to participate in a welcome where they share the same breath?  I found the symbolism very touching and I have found myself contemplating some of the ways that we, of another culture, practice our own form of the Hongi.

Tane breathing life into the woman he has created

My thoughts turn to all of you that I hope to hug on returning home. That physical gesture, combined with the closeness that it engenders, symbolizes to me a sharing of one heartbeat. We are happy to see each other!  Similarly, the experience of shedding tears with someone evokes a commonality of emotion at that moment. We learned in the Cooks to kiss on the cheek and have been thrilled to see that practice continued here in New Zealand. To me all of these greetings are far superior to the handshake, so we hope to make you all a little more Kiwi or Cookie by focusing past your out stretched hand to your cheek! You may grow to love that particular greeting as much as we do!

As is often the case, in attempting to teach our new friends about our culture, we have found ourselves instead, learning much more from them about theirs. We had a gathering at our home last evening and once again, witnessed the touching exchange of breath between two very old and dear friends. They also had their arms around each other and seemed reluctant to release. There was no embarrassment in the greeting, just a quiet interaction that we felt privileged to witness.

As always, we are happy and trying to work hard. Many of you have heard me say that I always wanted to live somewhere long enough not to feel like a tourist. In my life, I am grateful that this experience of acclimating has been a blessing in my life twice and it has changed my perspective in more ways than I can count. This December, many of our Cook Island friends will be spending time in Hamilton attending the temple and we will have the lovely opportunity of sharing some time with them. There will be hugs, back slaps, and laughter. We will enjoy favorite traditional Cookie foods that we have missed and we are excited to anticipate the singing and dancing that will be part of every evening. It will be like coming home. And speaking of coming home, we are looking forward to much of the same interaction with you next spring when we return to Utah. Perhaps there will be a little less singing and dancing on my part, because I expect Ward to pick up the slack on his end of those particular items! I can promise hugs, kisses on the check and tears, not necessarily in that order. We love you and miss you and find that we are thinking of you often and fondly.

Love, Ward and Susan    Elder and Sister Belliston, serving in Gisborne, New Zealand